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The "High-Functioning" Trap: Why Your 9-to-5 Is Draining Your Soul (And It’s Not Just The Job)

  • Writer: Michelle Karth
    Michelle Karth
  • 12 hours ago
  • 6 min read

If you’re like me, by the end of the day, you’re exhausted. It feels like you’ve run a marathon, even though you haven’t. 


Your brain feels “fried”, you’re irritable, and you may accidentally snap at your family or pets for looking at you the wrong way. Or breathing. 


All you want is silence and “alone time”. Peace and quiet. Dimmed lights. No other humans around. 


As you sit in the dark, contemplating when (or if) you will emerge from your safe, dark cave, you question why it’s so easy for your colleagues to make it through the day. Why is it so difficult for you to do the “normal” things? Are you lazy? Dramatic? Is there something wrong with you? 


I’m here to tell you that you’re not broken. People like us are part of the "invisible workforce”. We make up the estimated one in four employees who are neurodivergent but flying under the radar. We’re the ones who are struggling with the normal day to day, while everyone else seems to pass with flying colors. 


The Science: Why "Passing" Is Expensive

For neurodivergent individuals like us, exhaustion hits differently. Our exhaustion isn’t just from work, but from masking (or ‘social camouflaging’). This cognitive strategy is our way of appearing “normal” in public. We hide our stims and true autistic selves so that we can fit into the neurotypical landscape. While this might help us connect with our colleagues, it comes with a major cost to our mental health. 


Research shows that masking isn’t just about "being polite." It’s our complex thought process of how to be social. We’re essentially trying our hardest to do all of the “normal” things at the right time, and in the right way. This is exhausting, as I’m sure you know. 


This state of "perpetual performance" is metabolically expensive. It depletes our executive function reserves, leading to what researchers call Sensory Debt. 

Just like financial debt, sensory debt accumulates. After a while, this accumulation leaves us vulnerable to shutdowns or meltdowns. 


During my PhD, I can remember moments when I broke down and cried, unable to stand up from crouching in the corner of my room. Or feeling so overwhelmed, that I needed to lay on my back for awhile, on the floor, just to feel normal again. These meltdowns were the primary reason I sought out therapy, which eventually led to my autism diagnosis. 


The Missing Piece: Your Sensory Profile

To understand how this process works, we can use the weekly team meeting as an example to illustrate how people experience standard workplace scenarios differently. In other words, how neurotypicals experience meetings vs how neurodivergent people experience meetings. 


While neurotypical colleagues might filter out background noise and flickering lights, our neurodivergent brains process everything at once. Combine this with masking and sensory debt and it’s no wonder we hate situations like this!


At the Autism Assessment Center, understanding your Sensory Profile is an important part of how we understand you. And as neurodivergent people ourselves, we get what it’s like to be you! 

In our in-depth assessments, we use tools like the SPM-2 (Sensory Processing Measure) to gain a complete picture of how you process sensory integration across different environments.


If you’re fighting your own biology—trying to ignore the hum of the AC, the texture of your office chair, or the visual clutter of an open-plan office (yuck!)—you’re burning energy that you could be using for your actual work. You’re making things twice as hard as they need to be. You deserve to be fully present and able to do your best! 


Understanding your sensory profile isn't about being "picky"; it's about optimizing your environment so your brain can actually function. We want you to be able to function the best way you can!  


You Don't Have to White-Knuckle It: Workplace Accommodations

One of the biggest myths about adult autism is that you either can do your job "normally," or you can't do it at all. The reality is that many of us just need different tools to reach the same destination. I needed to approach my PhD in a different way than my colleagues, and that’s okay!

We all got there in the end, just different paths. 


This is where Accommodations come in.

You don’t always have to disclose your diagnosis to get help (we call this "Functional Disclosure"), but sometimes, having formal documentation is the game-changer you need to protect your energy.


At the Adult Autism Assessment Center, for our clients, we write Accommodation Letters for employment and educational purposes. We can help you formalize requests for things like:


  • Noise Control: Permission to wear ANC headphones.

  • Communication Style: Requests for written follow-ups after verbal meetings.

  • Environment: Modified lighting or a quiet workspace.


Our clinicians can draft these letters to focus on your specific functional limitations and needs, ensuring you get the support required to thrive without necessarily having to over-explain your medical history to your boss.


The Tools: Moving From Surviving to Thriving

If this resonates with you, the answer isn't to "try harder." It's to accommodate your neurology. Here are three science-backed shifts to reduce the load.


1. Externalize Your Executive Function

Stop trying to hold everything in your head. Use AI tools like Goblin.tools, which can break down a vague task into a step-by-step checklist for you. It can even "judge" the tone of your email to ensure you aren't sounding accidentally rude. Using these tools to assist you isn’t being lazy, it’s making life easier for you. 


2. Audit Your Sensory Debt

Control what you can. Active Noise Cancelling (ANC) headphones aren't a luxury; they’re  a prosthetic for a sensitive auditory system. If you can’t dim the lights, wear blue-light glasses or a brimmed hat to reduce visual input. I’ve also found transition lenses to be a lifesaver and don’t know what I ever did without them! 


3. Get Curious About Your Neurotype

If you’ve spent your life feeling like a failed version of a "normal" person, I want you to know that your brain isn’t broken. It’s specialized.


Resources & Screeners

If you see yourself in these descriptions, it might be time to investigate further. Research shows that validating your experience through screening tools is a great first step. These are awesome forms of self-discovery, and I’ve taken them myself! 


We’ve compiled our top screeners here to help you get started:



Conclusion

Understanding your neurotype is the first step toward building a life that doesn't burn you out. The traits that make the office difficult—your intense focus, your eye for detail, your need for clarity—are also your greatest assets. You should be proud of these traits! 


If you need help navigating this discovery or need an Accommodation Letter to make your workplace sustainable, consider booking a free consultation with our team. We are all neurodiversity-affirming clinicians who get it. We also offer neuro-affirming counseling to anyone in the world. We’re dedicated to helping you live your best life. 


Meet our wonderful neurodivergent team!


Warmly,







Michelle Karth, PhD 

Adult Autism Assessment Center


References

Attwood, T., & Garnett, M. (2024, February 27). Autistic burnout: Latest research. Attwood & Garnett Events. https://www.attwoodandgarnettevents.com/blogs/news/autistic-burnout-latest-research

Autism Society. (2025). ADA fact sheet. Download PDF (Note: While updated regularly, the core ADA Fact Sheet is hosted at this permanent link.)



Cleveland Clinic. (2022, June 2). Neurodivergent: What it is, symptoms & types. https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/symptoms/23154-neurodivergent


Davies, J., Romualdez, A. M., Pellicano, E., & Remington, A. (2024). Career progression for autistic people: A scoping review. PMC. https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC11494842/


Dublin City University. (2026, January 27). One in four employees self-identify as neurodivergent, according to new research from DCU. https://www.dcu.ie/instituteofeducation/news/2026/feb/one-four-employees-self-identify-neurodivergent-according-new


Guy-Evans, O. (2025, September 18). Undiagnosed autism in the workplace. Simply Psychology. https://www.simplypsychology.org/undiagnosed-autism-in-the-workplace.html


Life Skills Advocate. (2024, February 26). 101 neurodivergent life hacks for school, work, life & more. https://lifeskillsadvocate.com/blog/101-neurodivergent-life-hacks/


National Autistic Society. (n.d.). Deciding whether to tell employers you are autistic.https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/employment/deciding-whether-to-tell-employers-you-are-autisti 



ScienceWorks. (2025, October 14). Autism & burnout: ScienceWorks on camouflaging in 2025. https://www.scienceworkshealth.com/post/masking-burnout-understanding-autistic-camouflaging


The Invisible Workforce. (n.d.). The invisible workforce: A comprehensive analysis of undiagnosed autism in professional environments. (Note: This appears to be an internal or white paper title not currently indexed publicly. It aligns with themes in the DCU report above.)

University of Oxford. (n.d.). Guide: How to create a neuroinclusive workplace. Download PDF


 
 
 

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